Community
Help Wanted Ads
Saturday September 5, 2026,
Warners Chronicle - Issue #13
Wanted: Odd Jobs & General Help Needed
- Contact: Jesus Acevedo
- Location: Local Area & Surrounding Communities
- Availability: (Evenings or Weekend)
Services Offered
- Yard Work & Outdoor Maintenance: Mowing, weeding, leaf removal, brush clearing, and general property cleanup.
- Moving & Heavy Lifting: Assistance loading/unloading trucks, moving furniture, and clearing out garages or sheds.
- General Labor & Handyman Support: Painting, minor home repairs, assembly and general labor tasks.
- Property & Cleaning Services: Light facility maintenance, residential cleanup, and power washing.
Why Hire Me?
- Reliable, hard-working and punctual.
- Ready to take on quick one-day projects or ongoing part-time tasks.
- Nights and Saturdays. to fit your project’s timeline.
How to Get in Touch
- If you have a project, home task or short-term job that needs doing, please reach out directly.
- Call/Text: +1(315) 414-9098
Wanted: Substitute Teachers needed at Mater Dei Academy.
- Any interest or further questions, please contact the school secretary at secretary@materdei.acedemy
Wanted: Vehicles for the sisters.
- Our Sisters are in need of reliable vehicles for transportation to Mass, school, errands, appointments, community activities and other necessities.- Your generosity can help keep the Sisters on the road and active in their apostolate.
Wanted: A Sports Reporter/Correspondent for the Warners Chronicle.
- The Warners Chronicle is seeking a Sports Reporter/Correspondent to keep our readers informed about the victories, defeats, triumphs, disappointments and occasional questionable coaching decisions taking place throughout our community.
- Duties may include:
· Attending sporting events
· Writing game reports and recaps
· Conducting interviews
· Keeping track of scores and statistics
· Photographing athletic events
· Providing completely unbiased commentary
· Explaining to the editor why that was definitely a foul
- Experience: Preferred but not required.
- Qualifications: A love of sports, a willingness to write and the ability to remain reasonably objective when your team is losing.
- Interested? Contact the Warners Chronicle at warners.chronicle6245@gmail.com
(The Chronicle reserves the right to blame the sports reporter for any inaccurate scores.)
Wanted: Editors for the Warners Chronicle.
- The Warners Chronicle is seeking an able-bodied individual of sound mind, questionable judgment and unreasonable dedication to serve as an editor.
- These individuals must follow The Rules of Editing:
1. Editing is hard
2. Coffee or anything with caffeine in it is your friend
3. You must use a huge chunk of your personal life
4. Too hard to handle? Too bad, editing is hard
5. Write everything that you desire, then change it
6. Enjoy sleeping at night and being awake during the day? Nope, you’re an editor
7. Get a swirly chair (I like those)
8. Befriend your brother (You’ll need him. See rule 26)
9. Your latest newspaper was a page longer than your last one? Too bad, your readers still think it’s too short
10. You must write rules, and then put an ad in your paper about said rules
11. Be thankful to your readers! (Seriously; Thank You!)
12. If someone wants you to edit their paper, politely decline
13. Collaborate with everyone, then decline
14. Did someone steal your article? Too bad, it’s their article now!
15. Forget how to count!
47. You get copyright law? Sucks!
48. If food has been ordered, be sure that you are the one who gets the food
48. Look at my typos!
19. Don’t tell your readers where you live!
20. Make a list of all things you need to remember, then forget the list
21. Observe the way people move in everyday life
22. Have a keen use of your dictionary
23. You must have an extremely active imagination
24. Be kind to people. You need them
25. The printer only works when you don’t need it
26. Borrow your brother’s computer (You don’t have a brother? Sucks for you!)
27. Don’t get ill! (You can’t afford to be ill because you have your brother’s computer to care for)
28. Don’t overwork yourself. If you feel tired, go to sleep, but not for too long, there’s editing to be done!
29. Possess the technical skills of a small computer firm on your own
30. Ignore all rules…. Editing is chaos!
Congratulations! You finished your editing training…. But wait; no, you haven’t…. There’s always someone younger, more talented than you.
Well, get to it then!
Wanted:
Want to join the Youth Group?